Things are good.
Well, things are as good as they could be as a pregnant solo mom, I suppose.
We haven't had any crazy-scary-mommy days lately. My mood seems to have leveled out, and I feel like a much calmer and more relaxed parent. I have as much energy as I'm going to have between now and 2014. First and I are hitting our stride as Just the Two of Us, settling into a routine that works and keeps us both relatively pleasant company.
My belly is growing, but it's not cumbersome. It is interfering with bending over (which I often forget). It's an excellent dog pillow. Yesterday First lifted my shirt, pointed to it and said "brother!" I'm only just beginning to have a hard time getting comfortable to sleep.
Right now is a time when I foresee the discomfort ahead, the physical challenges of having a giant belly and an active toddler. I know that one of these days I need to think about the birth and train my husband to be the birth partner I need. And I'm forcing myself to stop there, to avoid remembering the first months of new life. I'm repressing memories of exhaustion and breastfeeding. I'm not allowing myself to wonder how it will work with a 2-year-old to take care of, too.
Instead, I'm enjoying this time that I have to give entirely to my first son, to relax in the moments he's at nursery or sleeping. Perhaps I've found peace with knowing that I won't have these quiet moments again for a couple of years after Second is born?
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