To Tell or Not?

I have a friend who fake-ordered alcoholic drinks on a girls weekend to avoid suspicion of her early pregnancy. Me, I always give in and tell so I can take a nap.

While I've convinced myself to not get too excited until I get to hear a heartbeat, I've been willing to tell people I can trust to keep the news to themselves. Mostly I know that I'll need a massive net of support if things don't work out – especially being so far from home and having First to look after.

But there's an art to it. There are certain people who can't have to wait too long to spill the beans. There are certain people who have to be told before others. Then we want to be certain that things are OK before telling my husband's work, so that deployment schedules don't start getting tweaked until we know for sure we need him home in February.

Then there's the question of making a big announcement on Facebook. The first time around, it was a relief to connect with other women who were also expecting, to ask questions and share the excitement. This time it feels more like a formality. Almost a courtesy to people who would otherwise hear about it from someone else. I don't think I want to receive a barrage of "I didn't know you were pregnant!" comments when a photo goes up in a few months, or when we announce the birth. But I don't know what I want to get from making an announcement before then.

Ambivalence. I wonder if it will go away after Thursday's appointment?